


Avengers: Ass of Ultron

by swagnushammersmith



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers: Age of Ultron
Genre: Bruce Banner & Tony Stark Friendship, Bruce Banner - Freeform, Does Ultron Have an Asshole?, Gen, Robot Assholes, Robutt, Science Bros, Talking about assholes, tony stark - Freeform, we just don't know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-04
Updated: 2015-05-04
Packaged: 2018-03-28 23:30:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3873967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swagnushammersmith/pseuds/swagnushammersmith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Robutt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Avengers: Ass of Ultron

**Author's Note:**

> Fandom: Avengers  
> Characters: Bruce Banner, Tony Stark  
> Word Count: 315  
> Additional Notes: I loved Age of Ultron. I loved Ultron's butt. It was a nice butt. I talked with a friend contemplating whether or not Ultron had an asshole. Then this fic happened. This is my first and probably only Avengers fanfic.

Tony and Bruce were hard at work designing their greatest hope for peace on Earth: Ultron. Tony sat on the floor, designs scattered between his legs.

“That’s looking nice, Tony,” Bruce said, hunched over his computer.

“Yeah, I really like how I designed the butt,” Tony said, admiring his work. “Imagine if it had an asshole.”

“Why would you give a non-organic AI an… an asshole?” Bruce asked, looking at Tony with an incredulous look on his face.

“I mean, why not?” Tony asked as if the idea of giving a robot an asshole wasn’t ridiculous.

“Well, for one, it wouldn’t need to eat, so, it wouldn’t need to digest anything, and then dispose of it!”

“I’m not talking about feeding it, Bruce.”

“This is an AI designed to protect the earth. We don’t need to give it an asshole.”

“But consider: What if we did?”

“Why would we?”

“You know those things you do that you know are completely useless, but you do it anyways just to say that you did it?”

“I usually get some feeling of accomplishment when I do do that, Tony.”

“Would you not feel some kind of accomplishment out of giving this,” Tony pointed at the design on the paper, “a functioning, contracting asshole?”

“...” Bruce thought for a moment. “I mean, I guess I would feel good about it.”

“Good.” Tony patted Bruce on the shoulder as he turned to return to his work. “By the way, when we test this thing out, I get first dibs on it.”

“Wait, what?”

“We gotta make sure the, uh… contraction works properly.”

“I swear to god, Tony,” Bruce said as he returned to his computer. “I’m gonna code that asshole to contract so hard it crushes your dick.”

“I’m not too worried about that,” Tony replied. “I’ve got an artificial heart already, I’m sure an artificial dick will be no problem.”


End file.
